A Snooze Away From Time (Part 2)

Posted on Sun Oct 13th, 2024 @ 1:09am by Lieutenant Ami Rori & Lieutenant Commander Brennyn Scott M.D.
Edited on on Sun Oct 13th, 2024 @ 1:10am

1,554 words; about a 8 minute read

Mission: Captains and Contraband
Location: Counselor's Office

Bree nodded, thinking carefully on every word that had been offered. "Perhaps learning to resist the impulse to respond can be a small start," Scott suggested. " I also wonder if it would help to explore what you're saying to yourself about these challenges? In other words, I wonder if giving you tools to manage anxiety and irritation in general might help? I will also consult others more familiar with these challenges than myself, of course."

"I don't think it would hurt!" Ami said with as much cheer as she could, "I know I've known Rori here for two years, almost, but I'll take any help I can get. This was never supposed to happen to me, so I wasn't prepared for it."

"You bring up an excellent point," Scott replied. "We've been focused on the aftermath of your traumatic joining and how to address it, but there's also the matter of the trauma itself. If your Trill physiology weren't in play, I might've considered your emotional reactivity a consequence everything you experienced leading up to the joining. Any sleep disturbances or flashbacks to those events?"

"Flashbacks, yes, but I've never woken up due to them?" Ami closed her eyes, but it was clear that she wasn't falling asleep, just trying to think back to some of the dreams she'd had regarding when Fiora had been hit, "I remember seeing a double flash before waking up in sickbay with a doctor working over me." Her eyes opened again, "Not me, me, but Fiora, me, before the decision had been made to remove Rori. With the medical technology available, it seems that usually wherever there's a spark of life left, we can do so much, but sometimes..." The Trill shook her head, "But I'd say that was the worst of it?"

Scott considered Ami's words for several long moments before venturing her theory. "I'm wondering if we're dealing with an equally traumatized symbiont? One that hasn't been able to process the loss of its past host?"

"And without a proper connection to the current host, no real way to overcome the loss of the past." It made sense to Ami, "But how can we resolve it? I mean, there's one way, but I don't know if anyone around knows the ceremony." She was referring to the rite of Zhian'tara, where volunteers would let previous hosts temporarily take over their bodies so that the current host could talk to them, "I think we'd need a Guardian to do that."

Scott frowned. She had no reason to think that wasn't true, But she needed to approach things one step at a time. "You may be right, but that doesn't negate our theory. Perhaps some additional research could reveal a workaround?"

"Possibly? I really should make a trip back to Trillius Prime to talk to them... But I really can't, because I can't be spared from the ship." Ami grew a bit antsy, "I'm sure there's more than just ceremony involved, probably sort of drug."

"Let's not get ahead of ourselves," Scott assured gently. "Even if we were in a position to head that way now, we have no idea what support would entail. Even so, if it comes to that, I would like to be right by your side, if you'll let me, that is. In the meantime, I'll do some research, but I think we should also keep meeting. Even if it's not a perfect solution, talking things through will help lower your stress and we have no reason to believe stress isn't a contributing factor. What do you say?"

Ami stifled another yawn, then tentatively nodded, "I suppose it won't hurt, but not quite sure it'll do more to reduce my stress than I'm already doing. Being a Chief Engineer is rather a bit more pressure than just chatting will do. Rori's just... Not that much stress, just tiring is all."

"Counseling incorporates more than just chatting. It's an opportunity to explore solutions to problems as well...sort of like conducting mini experiments to see what works and what doesn't," Bree offered. "You mentioned your job can be stressful and dealing with Rori can be tiring, so perhaps we can make sure you're getting enough sleep? I do realize the irony that I woke you up to do this, but perhaps we can figure out a way for you to receive counseling and sleep?"

"I sleep on average about thirteen hours a day, I think..." Ami pondered for a moment, "Sometimes more, sometimes less, so I really don't think that I need even more sleep unless we're going to call me Sleeping Dolly or whatever that Earthen fairy tale is called, I think finding a way to be more awake would help." There was a wry smile on her face at this, "But perfectly willing to experiment with things to do that better."

That answer was unexpected,and Bree began to wonder if they were dealing with depression in addition to or instead of trauma. "I agree, it would be worth exploring options to address your sleep. I didn't realize you were sleeping as much as you are. Have you always slept that much?"

"Until this parasite decided she needed to hitch a ride and I was the only one around to do it with?" Ami shook her head slowly, "I got usually around seven or eight, had energy at work, more energy to be active with after and if I really needed to push longer and harder, I could." She gave a slight smile, "I used to swim at least a dozen laps before bed just to wear myself down, now I have a hard time convincing myself to put on the swimsuit more than a couple times a week. Don't even go driving tanks nearly as much, but I think Jane'll push me to do that more soon enough."

Bree smiled. "In some ways, it sounds like your energy has returned to mere mortal levels, but I'll be sure to consider these changes in my research. How do you feel about the changes in your energy levels and sleep? Do you think they're interfering with your ability to function as you'd like?"

"Oh sure, I wish I wasn't sleeping as much, but I can still do the job overall." Ami gave a wishy-washy hand gesture, "Just not really much time or energy for much of a personal life."

"I'd like to work with you to change that," Bree answered. "It's important to have a decent balance between work and a personal life. Granted, I'll admit those of us in Starfleet struggle sometimes in general to balance work and a personal life, but at the very least, you deserve to have enough energy to choose where you spend it. Just to be clear, I wasn't suggesting you can't do your job, I just want to make sure you have the resources you need to make your own choices about how you spend your time."

"I'm fine, honest," Ami blurted out, "Oh sure, I complain about Rori here and there, sometimes more than a little, but overall it's worth it to be Joined, even as imperfectly as I am. In fact, it makes it even more interesting. Ever have an argument with yourself? At least I can either win or lose, and playing games against myself means I really can't cheat. I'm willing to make some changes, but I don't want to fundamentally change who I am."

Scott smiled. Despite Ami's challenges, it was clear she had a good sense of humor about it all and that could never be underestimated as a protective factor. "I can't say I've ever had an argument with myself in the sense you mean, but I read somewhere that talking to oneself is a sign of intelligence… Or was it insanity?" Scott teased, stroking her chin for a moment. "In any case, I'm certain anything we propose to do will not fundamentally change who you are, and if any of the suggestions from the experts I consult approach anything like that, you are under no obligation to go through with it. How about you give me some time to do a little research and we meet again in a week or so?"

"That sounds good to me, Doc!" Ami untucked her feet for the first time since seating herself and put them on the carpet, wiggling her toes on it, "Need me to keep any sort of diary involving all this," She waved at her midsection, "Or will my memory work for it?"

"Actually," Bree replied, "keeping a diary is a great idea. It'll help us identify potential triggers and coping strategies. Good thinking!"

"Then a diary I shall keep!" Ami slid her feet back into her shoes and stood, which caused her to yawn widely again and give a massive stretch, "And I guess I'll see you in um... Yeah, about a week."

"Sounds good," Bree replied, not liking the fatigue she saw, but reminding herself they had a plan to move forward. "Of course, don't hesitate to reach out sooner if anything changes or are you just want to talk."

"Of course, of course." Ami agreed, "Thanks Doc, see you next week!"

END

A Post by:

Lieutenant Commander Brennyn Scott
Chief Counselor

and

Lieutenant Ami Rori
Chief Engineer

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