Karen's Crash Course
Posted on Fri Jul 21st, 2023 @ 2:43am by Lieutenant JG Jane Sinclair & Lieutenant Karen Kujo 'Union Jane'
2,461 words; about a 12 minute read
Mission:
The Fast & The Fleet
Location: Holodeck 2
Timeline: Evening
Alpha Shift was finished for the day. The relief helm officer was on station. Paperwork was completed. Nothing else needed to be done.
And so Jane Sinclair went on a mission to find Karen Kujo.
An exploration of her usual haunts (quarters, lounge, flight deck) proved fruitless, so Jane resignedly asked the computer, which directed her to holodeck two.
The door was unlocked, but the helm officer hesitated. What was going on inside? Knowing Karen as she did, she was either driving, flying, or getting laid. The title of the program, Project D, didn't clarify *at all*. Well, if it was something naughty, they'd probably both have a good laugh about it, and Karen would learn a lesson in door locking.
Still, Jane was relieved when she walked in to find a race course not unlike the ones they were training on with Captain and Commander Takahashi. She heard the distinct sound of a car modded for racing coming close from beyond the turn. She stood in an observation area, where she (in the black shirt and blue with white and purple accents jacket and pants that she'd replicated as racing clothes) was visible but safely out of the way.
And then, over the crest of a nearby hill, she spotted it: a navy blue Nissan Skyline GT-R, sporting a set of black satin Momo Heritage SSRs and a unique hood graphic modeled after the "Union Jack" flag of Karen's native homeland, as it descended upon Jane like a Kaiju beast arisen from the primordial ooze and descending upon civilization to wreak havoc.
Then again, you could say that raising havoc was a specialty of Lieutenant Kujo's.
The car slowly drew up to Jane before coming to a stop. The driver's side window powered down and Lieutenant Kujo stuck her head out.
"Hey, Jane!" she waved.
“Karen!” Jane called back as she walked up to the driver side window. “I’m glad I caught you here. In this, no less! What is this? Tell me everything.” She gently traced a finger along the front fender. Last month the only time she had done anything with cars was in the context of that James Bond holonovel. But now she was falling increasingly in love with these ground cars. Fast and beautiful.
"This is my pride and joy," Karen grinned as she got out of the car. "Well, more like a bang-up holographic representation of my pride and joy, but even then it's still a replica of the real thing... but anyhow! 1991 Nissan Skyline GT-R, fully decked out bumper-to-bumper in tasteful modifications- courtesy of moi- to eke the best performance out of this baby as physically possible: dual Nismo N-1 Turbochargers, 750CC Injector Unit, Walbro 255LPH In-Tank Fuel Pump, RB25 Airflow Meter, 3-inch performance exhaust system with de-cat pipe and turbo downpipes, dual HKS Super Power Flow Air Intakes, Motec ECU, HKS Type R Intercooler, Tomei 260 Degree PonCams, Competition Clutch Stage 3 Clutch, lightweight flywheel, Quaife Six-Speed Gearbox, OS Giken Superlock LSD, Meister R Coilover Kit, Driftworks HICAS Eliminator Kit, Whiteline Adjustable 22MM Rear Anti-Roll Bar, Cusco Front Anti-Roll Bar, Hardrace Adjustable Suspension Arms, brakes swapped off of a newer Skyline, Toyo R888R Tires, Nardi Race Steering Wheel, Nismo Gearknob, Bucket Seats, Takata Harness..."
She banged her fist against the hood.
"Oh, and we can't forget; it's a known fact that honoring the British State is a surefire way to boost your car's performance."
"Well, yeah, obviously," Jane agreed before grinning widely, really emphasizing her own accent which had persisted from the early English colonizers of Proxima. "It's why George Hamilton-Norris won the Interstellar-One championship these last three years, the Union Jack on the side." The London-born-and-raised shuttle racer had sponsors from his hometown, HSBC and Rio-Vega, and put their collective national symbol on his ship. "Rookie when I raced him and he got the better of me, the prick," she added under her breath.
She stood up straight and took Karen by both hands. "I need help, Karen. I'm learning a lot from Keisuke and Takumi but it isn't enough. I've got good instincts but my skills all involve racing in the air. You're one of the best small-craft pilots I know and you're great on the ground. I need you."
"Well, you've come to the right place," Karen grinned. "What do you need me to help you with?"
“I can drive pretty well,” Jane said. “Maybe very well. I’m handling the corners okay, but I think I can do better. I’m slowing down too much to take them safely. I know there’s a way to drift on the turns without slowing down as much, if at all, but I can’t get it right.”
"Ah, so you want some advice on cornering?" Karen remarked. "Well... what's say we dive into this head-first and get some behind-the-wheel practice, see what areas we could possibly improve?"
Jane nodded eagerly and got behind the steering wheel. The holodeck automatically adjusted the seat position and mirrors to fit the almost six inches she had on her instructor.
Seatbelt on, she gripped the steering wheel, getting the feel for it. She gave a lopsided smile to Karen in the passenger seat before putting the car in gear and gunning it down the track.
She took the first turn competently. They didn’t hit the guardrail but both knew that if someone had come up behind them they would have been overtaken.
"Right, so first thing you want to bear in mind is that you're not trying to go fast through a single corner," Karen explained. "As much as your intuition is telling you otherwise, your main goal is to complete the entire course as fast as possible. So in that regard, you have to be anticipating two steps ahead and factoring what you're exiting out into. Take this next curve, for example:"
She motioned to the next turn right up ahead.
"We've got a nice, long straightaway coming out of that curve, so it would be more beneficial of us to take a late apex, beginning the turn a little later so that you can get the car straightened out sooner, and therefore accelerate earlier."
Jane nodded and got the car into position, angling it just right…
…to put the car into the guardrail. Thankfully the safety systems were online.
In a flash, the course reset and Karen’s car, restored perfectly, was ready for another try. As was Jane.
“Sorry. Let’s try again, yeah?”
Second attempt was better. The next turn in the course was similar to that one, and Jane did better still. She was getting the hang of it.
“What about the next one?” Jane asked.
"Okay, so the next corner leads into a series of corners, so what you actually want to do in this is instance is take an early apex," Karen replied. "This'll allow for a faster entry speed, but also more stability once you come out of the turn, which in turn gives you greater precision in navigating the corner immediately thereafter."
“Early apex,” Jane repeated. First attempt was still a bit late, and when she got to the next one she had to overcorrect and they spun out (though, Karen was quick to assure her it was alright; they were in the holodeck, so there was room for err). Second attempt was too early and they clipped the interior shoulder (Once again, Karen reassured her it was alright; she could always respawn the car if it got too badly damaged). But the third was almost perfect. Early apex, which helped her get into the next one at just the right spot.
Jane Sinclair was getting the hang of it.
“Teach me more, senpai,” she said with a grin, using a term she’d seen in some of the mangas she knew Karen read.
Karen threw her head back and laughed. "I'm 32, you're 33; but I appreciate the honorific, Kohai."
“Age is nothing to experience,” Jane countered as she took the next turn almost perfectly. “Now, as I’m practising, you need to tell me something. What’s this ‘I’m already spoken for’ you said to Lieutenant Commander Double-Ds? Has someone taken your heart?”
Karen threw her head back and laughed. "Funny story, that; you remember that cute Yorkshire girl from the wedding, Churchill?"
Jane nodded. “Elisabeth, right? Blonde, a hair taller than you, into old sea ships, cute butt?”
"Bingo, butt and all," Karen chuckled. "So, word on the ship was that she had submitted a letter of resignation after Commander Queed came aboard, so I went to her quarters and tried to talk her down from leaving. She had said there wasn't much point in her sticking around, so..."
She scratched the back of her neck and blushed. "Well, I took a leap of faith and asked her out. She was surprisingly not as resistant to the idea as you might've thought."
“Aww,” Jane said. “You got it bad, girl.” She looked at her friend for a second — and was rewarded with a crash into a guardrail. Oops. Quick reset and they were back in it. “So, does that mean no more flirtatious comments toward me?” She fake-pouted. Even though Jane was well and truly off the market, a bit of harmless flirty fun between the two of them (and Mia) had been commonplace. Like pilots’ locker room talk.
"Well, not as much as I used to," Karen sighed. "I mean, not like I can help myself when I'm surrounded by all these attractive people, but Elisabeth's made clear that if I want to make a relationship work for the long-term, I've got to dial back on the innuendo."
“Dial back?” Jane made a tsk-tsk sound and shook her head playfully, grinning all the while. “Are you sure you can last that long? Keep going all night, even?” Early apex, right into the next turn. “After all, you’re always left me satisfied, teaching me to handle these truly beautiful curves,” she continued, forcing a breathy, lusty demeanour to her voice. “If I’ve learned nothing else, it’s that you’re excellent at handling a tight…corner.” As they cleared the next turn of the course, a hazard had been thrown up in the form of a giant puddle, which splashed across the car and made Jane spin out and hit the guardrail on Karen's side. “Look, I've got you up against the wall," she said, leaning in closer to Karen. The puddle had been so big, water still rolled down the windshield and both side windows, making it looks like they'd just driven through a storm. "Look how wet we are,” she added playfully, looking at Karen and biting her lower lip.
Karen recoiled back in surprise. For all the teasing the two of them had exchanged over the past month or so, she was hardly expecting the Flight Control Officer to come on this strong- especially given Jane's own (and very public) commitment to Lieutenant Reno.
"J-Jane," she began, holding up a finger. "While I certainly don't mind the dirty jokes, I think it's best we leave it at that- you have Lieutenant Reno, and now I have Elisabeth; I wouldn't want to screw up both of our relationships by having an affair."
Jane couldn’t help but grin through the bit lip and start to laugh. “Oh god, I got you so good! That was amazing!” She wiped away a tear from the corner of your eye. “Don’t worry, my friend, I’m not propositioning you. I’m very loyal to Alisha, as you said.” She began to regain her composure. “Sorry. Couldn’t help it. You set me up too good. I had to see how strong I could lay on the innuendo. I guess I did pretty good, yeah?”
Karen's jaw flapped open and closed in disbelief. "I... bu.... you..."
She buried her face in my hands. "My God, I can't believe I bought into that! What the hell is wrong with me?"
"I'll tell you what's wrong with you," Jane replied, still chuckling. "Only one thing makes Karen Kujo re-think romance to this level. You in loooooooooove, girl."
The car reset and they resumed the course, Jane continuing to improve with every turn hit. She began to sing a little tune. "Karen and Elisabeth, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G."
"Guilty as charged," Karen chuckled, putting up her hands. "Not even gonna try and deny that one. And hey, it's not like you and Lieutenant Reno aren't doing the exact same thing. I mean, unless you're putting her up on a pedestal or something because kissing the Alexis Silverstar is out of your league..."
It was Jane's turn to blush. "No pedestals here. Only difference I see between me and Alisha and you and Elisabeth is time. A few months together versus a few...days?" Jane ventured a guess. "Days quickly become weeks, and then months, and then if you're lucky years," she added sweetly and sincerely. "Still, I'm aloud to tease my good friend Karen."
"My Nan always used to say that a slice of humble pie every now and then was the flavor of life," Karen remarked. "I mean, I hated her, but I can't deny she was onto something with that one."
That made Jane giggle. "Sounds about right. Anyway, let me know if you and Elisabeth want to double with Alisha and me sometime. Double date, I mean. Dinner and drinks. Get your mind out of the gutter, Karen." she added with a cheeky wink.
"Yeah, I don't think someone as conservative as Elisabeth will be one too enthused with the whole idea of swapping partners," Karen chuckled as she settled back into her seat.
A different kind of turn was coming up, one near the end of the track which Jane recognized. "I know this one. This is the one Takumi said is best done by drifting. Any advice, Senpai?"
Karen glanced over at Jane and grinned. "I think you already know the answer to that question, Kohai."
"TOKYO DRIIIIIIIIIFT!!!" the two of them could be heard cackling as the Skyline powered its way around the corner.
Posting by (In order of appearance):
Lieutenant Junior Grade Jane Sinclair
Chief Flight Control Officer, USS Myogi (NCC-65918)
Lieutenant Karen Kujo
Nightkids Squadron Leader, USS Myogi (NCC-65918)
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