Union Jane Meets The Grim Reaper!
Posted on Sun Sep 10th, 2023 @ 10:42am by Commodore Tohru Honda & Captain Maho Takahashi & Captain Shimakaze Zh'gero & Commander Elisabeth Churchill & Lieutenant Commander Ryosuke Takahashi 'Ry' & Lieutenant Karen Kujo 'Union Jane'
1,330 words; about a 7 minute read
Mission: The Fast & The Fleet
Lieutenant Shrel Th'shrashren, Air Boss of the USS Haruna, had just been lined up with his R33 Skyline GT-R for a downhill run against... Someone from the USS Myogi. However, he had been told that it wouldn't be his exact counterpart, as at the moment, he had no counterpart on the Myogi. So, when his opponent's R32 Skyline GT-R was lined up, he couldn't help but burst into laughter.
"I'm sorry, I don't think I can do this..." He cackled. "If you don't have a fucking department head, you shouldn't be wasting my time like this!"
"Welp, makes my job a whole lot easier," Karen retorted before turning back to face Maho. "Hey, Captain! We've got ourselves a sore loser over here!"
"Is he refusing to face you?" Maho asked.
"YES!" Karen proclaimed, pumping her fist as if this had been an easy victory for her.
"No, not in the slightest" Shrel giggled. "Unless your junior officer is too chicken to be taught a lesson in staying in line! Bawk! Bawk, bawk bawk, BAWK!"
"So says the pot who called the kettle black," Karen fired back, evidently unfazed by Shrel's condescending remarks.
"Get ahold of yourself, Shrel." Shimakaze said sternly, placing a hand on her air boss' shoulder. "She might be junior, but she's allegedly the best they have in that department."
"Well, best or not, she's still way below me!" Shrel said. "Perhaps this will serve as a valuable lesson that lower deckers should stay where they belong, and not to pretend to be senior officers."
"What's say you put your money where your mouth is, then?" Karen grinned. "You win, I'll suck you off; I win, you kiss that prized commission of yours goodbye?"
"What??" Maho, Tohru, and Shimakaze all gasped.
"You can't do that!" Shimakaze protested. "Shrel is one of my valued senior staff members!"
"And gambling is against the rules." Tohru added. "This was supposed to be a friendly competition-!"
"I don't see where in the rules it says we can't make ourselves a little 'Gentleman's wager'," Karen was quick to point out.
"Alright." Tohru sighed. "But put it on the record that I did not endorse this!"
"Carrie, that's quite a wager you're making..." Elisabeth muttered in concern.
Karen glanced over at Elisabeth and winked. "Relax, Izzy; I wouldn't be making gutsy bets like these if I knew I couldn't beat them."
"You know what? You're on." Shrel said. "You're not only on, but you're going down, motherfucker!"
"Are you sure about this, Shrel?" Shimakaze asked. "If you lose, you'll have to resign from Starfleet."
"Ah, relax, 'Kaze; putting junior officers in their place is my specialty!" He said. "A good gambler never makes a bet he knows he can't lose!"
"Alright, drivers to your cars!" Tohru called. "Spectators, clear the starting line. We'll be starting the countdown soon!"
As Maho, Elisabeth, and Shimakaze cleared out, Shrel got into the R33 and kicked the RB26 engine to life.
Alright, junior officer: Shrel thought. If you think you're ready to play with the big boys, think again. Because I'm not going anywhere!
Tohru raised her hand into the air.
"Starting in 5! 4! 3! 2! 1! GO!" Tohru dropped her hand, starting the race.
Contrary to Shrel's predictions, Karen was hardly as dumb as she presented herself to be; she'd spent a great deal of time fine-tuning her R32 to perfection, and then some. Everything from the ECU to the suspension arms had been modified with a singular goal in mind: to create the ultimate old-school racing machine. And so, as the flag dropped, it was hardly a contest as to whom would be snagging themselves an early lead.
Don't get too comfortable with that lead, junior officer: Shrel thought. You only got it because your R32 is about 100kg lighter than my R33. But there's a reason my call sign is 'Grim Reaper,' and why it carries over to the SpeedStars. I'll do anything to win, even if it means playing a little dirty...
As Karen slowed down to take the first corner, Shrel made his intentions known early on, bumping Karen's R32 with his R33 from behind to send the other car into an uncontrolled slide.
"Ngh," Karen grunted as she struggled to regain control of the car. "Faffin' Radgie... he's lucky this is just a simulation, because if it were the real deal, I'd be yanking him out of the car to whip his ass!"
Much to Shrel's annoyance, on the cusp of spinning out, the R32 recovered from the spin.
Lucky break: Shrel thought. But, luck can only take you so far... Junior officer...
For the next several corners, the racing was surprisingly clean. The R33 followed the R32's line while also improving upon it, closing the gap little by little with each corner.
About halfway down the course, however, the R33 gave the R32 another shunt from behind. There was an earthen embankment on the outside of the corner. At this point in the course, the road was too narrow to recover before hitting the embankment, and Shrel was certain this would be the point where Kujo would crash.
"Oh, so that's how you wanna play it?" Karen grinned. "Game on, ya blue-bellied motherfucker."
Much to Shrel's astonishment, the R32 coasted effortlessly along the embankment before Karen was able to regain control of the vehicle and guide it back onto the roadway.
The spectators were dumbfounded.
"Did she just..."
"I think she just pulled off a wallride!"
Ryosuke was among the spectators who had witnessed Kujo's move to stay in the race.
A very Klingon thing to do, Th'shrashren: Ryosuke thought.
So, a little embankment won't stop you either, huh? Shrel thought. Perhaps the only thing left that might is 1500 kg of R33 not yielding the racing line...
As the corners wound down, Shrel would have to make his move sooner or later if he wanted any hope of winning the race. At one of the final corners, Shrel decided it was now or never, and began his charge up the inside. If Karen wouldn't yield, he'd take her down with him...
"What the hell is he doing?" Karen observed.
With neither driver taking evasive action, the two GT-Rs made contact with one another. The impact caused a loss of traction to both drivers. However, skilled as he was, Shrel was unable to recover, and spun out, skidding to a stop.
After catching his breath for a moment, and realizing what this potentially meant, Shrel's fist struck the steering wheel.
"DAMNIT!!!" He cursed at the top of his lungs.
"Hoo-OOH!!!" Karen cheered. "Nightkids, Baby!"
When all was done and dusted, the NightKids now had a 2 point lead on the SpeedStars. At the bottom of the course, Shrel made good of his end of the wager:
"Well, I lost..." He sighed, handing his combadge to Shimakaze. "I'll have my things packed and be off the Haruna tomorrow."
"Shrel..." Shimakaze muttered. "Are you sure?"
"I made a deal, and now I must deal with the consequences of my decision:" Shrel said. "It has been an honor to serve alongside you, Captain Zh'gero."
Gripping Shrel's combadge, Shimakaze gave Maho a rather mean look, as if to tell the other captain that she wasn't going to get away with this...
Posting by
Commodore Tohru Honda
Task Force Jomo Commanding Officer
Captain Maho Takahashi
Commanding Officer
USS Myogi
Captain Shimakaze Zh'gero
Commanding Officer
USS Haruna
Commander Elisabeth Churchill
Acting Chief Diplomatic Officer
USS Myogi
Lieutenant Karen Kujo
Squadron Leader
USS Myogi
Shrel Th'shrashren
Former Air Boss
USS Haruna
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